Yesterday I was trying to put into words my excitement and anticipation about an upcoming trip and best-friend-reunion. However, for things such as these I couldn’t find words.
Instead – a picture.
I wish everyone could know my little brother well. He’s a reserved, inquisitive and intensely thoughtful young man – full of quirks and facets unbeknownst to many.
One of my favorites is how he expresses excitement. Here, words will be lopsided and inept, but I’ll still give it a go... When Corey gets excited he flaps his hands – in a way that is chaotic but bounded. He rocks from side to side and sometimes jumps up and down ever so slightly.
He’s sixteen now, so this method of expression is deemed no longer appropriate and he’s learning to do it less and less. But sometimes, when he’s interested and invested in something, he’ll ask you a question (leaning in ever so slightly and pausing to process) and then, without hesitation will launch into an exclamatory response and enter into this state of elation and anticipation.
This is what I picture when I have a deep sense of enthusiasm, expectation and joy.
I love my brother, wish I lived closer to him and wish I knew his quirks and the intricacies of the man he’s becoming even more fully. Along this vein, I want to cherish all that I know about my brother and get to experience with him as I mourn for my dear friend who lost her younger sister this week.
Fuck you very much, life, for inexplicable losses.
But thank you all the more for the joys that precede them.
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